Non Sequiturs - February 2010

Antonyms

1. The opposite of "spring in my step" is "winter in my neck".
   
2. The opposite of "workday drudgery" is "donut euphoria".
3. The opposite of "optimism" is "regularly going three days in between shaves".
4. The opposite of "nattering nabobs" are "hobnobbing Jim Bobs".

This Was Said©

Perfectly sensible sentences uttered by me, now stripped of all context.

1. I don't want to get too drum-circle with all this.
2. Sometimes, I get the feeling that I'm on the cusp of awesome. But mostly, I'm driving the slow bus to Avuncularville.
3. The appearance of being a nice guy is far more enjoyable than actually being a nice guy.
4. Nah, you don't want to spread your mother's ashes there. You'll end up with spreader's remorse.

Classic Grifts©
A public service to raise awareness of notable cons, flimflams, swindles, and cheats.

1. Doctor Floofnuppin and His Atomic Grope-fingers
   
2. Skullcap for Two
3. A Licorice Chapeau on Layaway
   
4. Steve Jobs and the Ill-fitting iCravat