Non Sequiturs - March 2010

Antonyms

1. The opposite of "bathtub meth" is "toilet tank hydroponics".
   
2. The opposite of "tweezer" is "facial crescent wrench".
3. The opposite of "cotillion" is "South by Southwest".
4. The opposite of "South by Southwest heebie geebies" is "ACL Festival anticipation".
   
5. The opposite of "nostalgia" is "meta".

This Was Said©

Perfectly sensible sentences uttered by me, now stripped of all context.

1. You're like my sense of humor's consigliere.
2. My dating method? I just go out in public a bunch, then incessantly check Shot in the Dark / Missed Connections personal ads.
   
3. Yeah, that's my brand of charm. Suave quirkiness.
4. People listen to him. Guy's got aphorisms.
   
5. No, I don't want to see Stomp. It's just youths in loose clothing, trying to percuss the mundane.

Classic Grifts©
A public service to raise awareness of notable cons, flimflams, swindles, and cheats.

1. Solipsistic One-card Monte
2. Duodenum for a Day
3. Tall Shorty-Pants and the Less than Flattering Kerchief
   
4. Top Shelf Boozahol with Bottom Shelf Company